there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Enjoy the penises
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
