ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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