Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
