i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
