what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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