i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
