Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
My pussy is not your playground.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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