8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize