What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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