Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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