I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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