We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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