I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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