I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
