Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
