break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
