how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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