I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
This is my gift to your gina
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Is Oprah even human
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