well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
