my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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