16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
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