But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
