No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
