Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize