It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
