this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
