I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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