Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
