I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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