he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize