i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize