WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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