we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
