i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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