Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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