the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
