New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
