i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
