Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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