Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
