I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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