My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
