Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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