playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
