Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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