It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Do vagina's smell?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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