why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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