His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
