How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
