I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
