Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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